Work It July 30, 2007

wow…has it really been that long since I last posted? (like the picture? that’s our happy family simpsonized…go to www.simpsonizeme.com to do you too!)

Fiona is still working on crawling…she work day and night on this new project…even when you hold her she gets into crawling position. I hope that once she is really crawling around she’ll stop doing it night and day. She can spin herself in a 360 pretty fast and she’s slowly but surely moving forward. Her favorite thing to do is push herself up onto her feet in a “down dog” yoga pose. The poor girl has worn away her little toe nails so even on the hottest days i have her in thick smart wool socks!

So tomorrow is a big day in our lives. I return to work full time. I told them (and myself) that I would give it a try and see how it goes…you never know…I might really like it. Thousands and thousands of families do this all the time and are perfectly content and happy….so here we go.

I’m trying not to think about it too much…I don’t want to defeat myself before I even begin. But then I’m afraid to not think about it enough…it can be easy to get swept up in the busy lifestyle and not stop and see what’s going on or pay attention to how you really feel. I know the first couple of weeks are going to be hard on us all. Even zoe dog is going to have readjust to not having me home all the time.

I have started to write more and then erased three times already. There is so much I want to say and for some reason it is all so hard to get out. I will save it. Save it till next week when I can look back and see.

I must have kissed her cheeks a million times today. They are so soft and squishy. And when I kiss her cheek I get to smell her skin.

little monkey toes…your mother loves you.

Moving Forward… July 16, 2007

For the past couple of weeks Fi has mastered the art of scootching backwards. She pushes herself up with her arms and then her feet slip out behind her and another inch or two is gained. Friday she started something new….I walked in to get her from her crib and she was up on her hands and knees….just like that…she would hold her belly off of the ground for 10 or so seconds and then PLOP! it would hit the mattress and she would exhale letting me know that it took all of her energy to lug that big old belly into the air. And then she would do it again and again. Tonight she realized that if she did all of that, and then put her head down on the ground she could slide forward….not backward….and it begins. Just like that we are starting to crawl. I’m not sure what tomorrow will bring….maybe she’ll have forgotten her new trick or maybe by tomorrow night she’ll be racing around us in circles. Either way we are moving forward!

Day at the Beach July 11, 2007

Monday we had a fantastic day at the beach. Ellie and Jackson met zoe, fiona and I at Luther Burbank Park on Lake Washington to relax in the cool shade and try out the water. It would be Fiona’s first time in the “surf”.
I felt like super-mom arriving at the park…I had Fi in the moby, zoe beenered to me, the diaper bag over my shoulder overflowing with towels and blankets and a tray of iced coffees in the other hand. It was a sight to see!

We found a very nice place in the shade and spread out. Fiona loved the water and now I can’t wait to get her into the pool. I wasn’t sure how she’d do because she seems luke warm (no pun intended) about her baths…but then she’s kind of stuck in one place on her back still so she really doesn’t get to explore quite yet.

It was the perfect afternoon and both kids even took a nice little nap under the tree despite all the yelling and screaming Y kids that were around. Zoe enjoyed herself too. Ellie and Jackson are off for a month long road trip now and we will be thinking about them while they’re gone – good luck!

5 Months July 11, 2007

When Fiona was just about 8 weeks old I met Greg’s parents for dinner at a family-friendly mexican joint. I took her in the sling and prayed that she would sleep all the way through dinner so that she didn’t scream and cry uncontrollably in public. Greg was out of town and we rarely ventured into public for this long of a period of time because of the crying. While we were there a family sat down at the table across from us and they also had a baby in a car seat who they propped up on a chair and sat there playing with his toys while quietly watching his family eat their dinner. The mom looked over at me and Greg’s dad asked how old? 5 months she said. How old is yours? 8 weeks I said trying to attempt a smile that would read that i was really having fun and enjoying this. She looked me in the eye and with a soft and understanding tone said, “well, all I can tell you is that it really does get better and easier. Just hang in there, I understand.” I’m an emotional person anyway, that coupled with my out of whack hormones and my exhausted being i started to cry. Greg’s dad looked at me like I was crazy.

It meant so much to me, I couldn’t imagine ever having such a calm baby, ever being able to sit at a table and eat dinner together. But here we are. It really did get better! 4 months was really good to us, and I’m so excited to see what 5 is going to bring!

Things are happening so fast now. There’s the binky and the bottle and the screeching and the hysterical laughter. Now we also are in full scootch mode. She can pull her knees up underneath her and even push her belly off of the ground….off course then she pushes her legs back out and she ends up going backwards….but she’s really good at it and we are constantly finding her other places then where we set her….let the baby proofing begin! She’s a great napper and a decent night time sleeper…our bed time routine is pretty good and she seems to actually enjoy her crib and being put down…she usually wakes up as i set her in her crib and she looks at me and smiles and rolls over off to sleep. She knows zoe’s name now and when we say it or if she hears her walking she looks all around to find her and then laughs. she’s starting to know her own name too (it seems) which is really exciting. she LOVES being outside and is mesmorised by the trees and flowers…she will even follow tiny little bugs with her eyes….she doesn’t miss a thing! She’s almost able to sit up by herself and of course, she’s thoroughly enjoying watching her very first Tour de’ France.

All I can say is wow. what a difference a couple of months make. We just might have to go back to that mexican place to celebrate!

Independence Day July 4, 2007

I don’t know what was different. There was something about the sucking. She’s been sucking on things for a long time now, her fist, my finger, any toy or object that her little hands can grasp and pull to her awaiting mouth. But Sunday the sucking seemed even stronger, even more necessary, and her fingers didn’t seem to be satisfying the need. I put the soothie in her mouth….thwpt…..out it went. Then on a whim I went and grabbed one of the many binkies I dutifully bought back when I was a mom-in-waiting, and put it in her mouth.

It was as if she had always had a binky in her mouth. Wham. Just like that. She loved it. She was already an old pro…taking it in and out, putting it in backwards and sideways, spitting it half way across the room then crying till we went and got it. We went to a BBQ at my sisters house that day and the whole family sat and watched in amazement as we put the binky back in over and over again…each time it was gone for too long she opened wide waiting to get it back.

This was a good sign. Never before had she allowed us to put any foreign objects into her mouth. Could this lead to the bottle?

Monday Mom came up to watch fi while I worked. That afternoon we ran to fred meyer and bought “nuk” bottle nipples – the same brand as her now beloved binkies- tomorrow would be the day (duhnt, duhnt, duhhhhhh)

Tuesday mid morning my mom warmed up the bottle I had prepared and when she was ready popped it into Fi’s mouth. CHA CHING!!!! She took it! NO KIDDING SHE REALLY REALLY TOOK IT!!!!! We didn’t want to celebrate so we just smiled and waited. A couple of hours later Fi seemed hungry again so I took the bottle….CHA CHING!!!!!! She took it again! Then again later for 4 more ounces from my mom!!!!

That night I went to bed so proud of my little girl. But the surprises were just beginning.

I got to bed around 10p.m. and read for a bit…..the next time I opened my eyes it was 5:45 A.M.!!!!!! What? Was I confused? Had I gotten up and just not remembered it? Had Greg heard her before me and gotten up instead of me and taken care of it? What? DID SHE SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT?????? OH MY GOD!!!! I did what every mother does….I got up and ran into her room to make sure she was still breathing. There she was, sound asleep, on the other side of the crib and facing the opposite direction from where she started….but sound asleep.

My little girl slept through the night. I can not believe it. I didn’t expect it to happen for months yet. I don’t expect it to be a regular thing, but what a prize to get this so early.

To top it off she took another bottle this morning from Greg- finally daddy got to feed his little girl, he was so excited and felt so proud, it was wonderful- and then he bounced her off to her nap. All by himself. She not only ate from him but let him put her down too.

I can’t tell you how this makes me feel. I am finally not the only one that can care for this child. I mean, don’t get me wrong, we are extemely lucky people who have loved ones coming out of our ears helping to take care of her…but until this day I have been the only one who could truly meet her needs. I felt the slightest bit of pressure lift from my shoulders this morning.

It is my Independence Day.