I’m back August 29, 2008

Sorry it’s taken me so long to post – my excuses range from my inability to walk all the way to my computer for a few days to the time it’s taken me to clean and put away the mass amount of soaking wet/muddy gear I had.

I originally started writing out the details of our days – but while reading it over my words didn’t seem to capture the true experience of the experience so while I might be a bit vague here I think you’ll get a better idea. I’d be happy to answer any questions if you care to ask.

My SIL said it best summing up the trip on her Facebook account: “is glad everything came out OK after it all went to shit.”

The first day was a 19 hour day. About 12 of it in the rain. It was easily – hands down – the hardest thing I have ever attempted in my life. Not just physically but mentally as well.

Had I trained enough? No. Was I ready? No. Did I do it? Yes.

My brother hurt his knee early on and was amazingly able to keep a strong pace even though he was in a lot of pain. I took a good fall on a slick bridge; twisting my ankle and bruising my leg, butt and arm pretty good. There was little talk on the trail that day, partially because of the rain and our hoods and partially because my brother just couldn’t carry a conversation with his knee the way it was. 37 miles – around 15,000 ft of elevation, lot’s of time to think.

I will say that I felt pretty good (oh i know you couldn’t tell that by the way i was walking ) but for whatever reason – and this was the hardest part – I realized out there on the trail….my heart just wasn’t in it. Maybe I am a different person then I was 4 years ago when I first dreamed this event up sitting next to Mystic Lake with my brother on a lazy backpacking trip. Maybe my drive has changed. Maybe not being in the shape I needed to be in had to do with my wanting to stop along the way and smell the flowers. Whatever reason, it just wasn’t there – “it” being whatever that crazy little spark that tickles the bottom of your belly when you’re pushing yourself past the limits “normal” people consider to be normal.

I struggled with whether I would get up and hike the next day. This was it…my chance…I couldn’t give in now…or could I. I have an 18 month old at home who won’t understand why mommy can’t chase her for a week or desperately needs to sleep for 12 hours plus naps to recover her body. The first time my brother did this it took him over a month to recover.

In the end my question was answered for me.

2 of our party of 8 didn’t make it back to camp that first night. This was NOT in our plan. Being responsible hikers that we consider ourselves to be we all had “emergency” gear in our packs – but light was the theme – and these two should never have gone on this trip to begin with – we weren’t sure what they had in their packs. This is a serious situation. It was easily in the 30’s that night – we were all wet and cold and exhausted. The trail had a handful of very dangerous areas that would not be wise to do in the dark.

Our trip was now a rescue mission.

I will spare you all the details. They were found – and found walking towards camp. They were still on the trail and had spent a night that they weren’t too willing to talk about. What happens on The Wonderland Trail stays on The Wonderland Trail apparently. They finally made their way to camp around 6 p.m. – the next night. So day 2 didn’t happen – it was to be a 34 mile day and the most anyone hiked that day was maybe 12.

I don’t think I could have completed the whole thing. I’ll go ahead and say that I know I couldn’t have. In some ways it was fantastic to have a great excuse not to have had to try – and yet sitting here at my computer tonight with the swelling finally down in my feet and ankle enough that I think I could get my shoes back on – I wish I had had the chance.

We don’t have plans on doing it again any time soon – and I’m doubtful that we would open it up to as many people if we ever did think of doing it again. But neither my brother or I am ready to say we will NEVER try it again – the mountain is still there and we have yet to complete this challenge. For now I am proud of what I did accomplish. The many miles that I did make. My bruises are still there and the swelling is still around but for the most part I think I’m recovered. I can’t wait to get back onto the trail and enjoy it. I can’t wait until Fi is old enough to come with me.